Change of Direction

A friend of mine announced today that she is stepping back from elite level canoe slalom for the foreseeable future. Kate Lawrence has been paddling for over 17 years and she's about to take an extended holiday around Europe. Sans boat.


It's been coming since Kate missed out on Olympic selection earlier this year but it's taken 4 months for her to be sure that this is the right decision.


When I think about her situation, two things spring to mind.


Firstly, I vividly remember missing selection in my last year of Juniors and grieving. It's not comparable to seeing your decade-old dream pass by, but I can remember that heart-twisting gut flip. It's similar to being put down by someone you have a crush on, you know? Flump-stomach-flip. Only it lasts much longer. Do not underestimate how much you can grieve for a lost dream. 


So part of me feels bad for Kate.


A much, MUCH bigger part of me is ridiculously excited for Kate.


I think the slalom scene is addictive partly because everyone looks good, everyone speaks several languages, everyone is laid-back, everyone is a demigod, everyone is cool. And of course when you are fast, it feels effing amazing. 


But there is more out there. And there's more inside too. Kate's about to learn new things, scare herself in new ways, make different decisions, test herself, discover new identities, new priorities, new passions. 


When I think about it, it's more than a change of direction because there is no new direction yet. That's what Kate gets to work out in the next few years. 


It's really making me smile. 


PS. How cool is the photo? I have a clever sister in law who decided an underwater camera case was a necessity. Now I agree.